Well, for those who haven’t talked to me recently, I obviously haven’t blogged here in a while. I have one bit of good news that I thought I’d share before I get out what I just need to get out there somehow. I’m pregnant! Yay!
Which leads me to where I am now– at home. Everyone is telling me I’m normal and, believe me, I’m grateful to have pregnancy symptoms and know I have a living baby inside there. But I don’t feel normal at all. I don’t even want to be sitting in this chair right now. I want to tip over and lay on the floor right where I am. My nerves, however, are jumping out of my skin and I’m between puking and pooping all day long. I cry at the drop of a hat for no reason at all whether it’s because no one around here can find me a stromboli or because Cesar thinks his wife is psycho emotional (and she is). I don’t want to work. I don’t want to leave the house. I don’t even want to leave my couch except to get the food out of my body whichever way it deems most urgent at the moment. We’re talking about me, here! I’m the one who broke my nose twice, and both times continued playing soccer/basketball! I worked 14+ hours a day before and didn’t bat an eye. I almost never missed out on work or any other commitments for that matter. So what is so normal about me being so completely stricken to a couch/ bed without wanting to leave it for any reason whatsoever. I know pregnancy is rough and pregnant women work all the time… so did I! I’ve been pregnant before. But I feel completely knocked off my feet and like there’s no way back up until something changes. But everyone tells me I’m normal. How am I supposed to keep a job and keep myself and my baby? I’ve tried to be optimistic and confident, but every day that I feel worse, I don’t know how to face an active world right now, as much as I really do miss that world.
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